I bought cut tulips last weekend, even though they sort of give me the willies, what with the whole continuing to grow and turning to get sunlight even after they’re cut thing. Once I came home and found a vase with the tulips it was holding in a puddle of water on the floor. For a split second I thought someone had broken into my apartment, but then I realized that the top-heavy tulips had been stretching toward the windows, and tumbled off the shelf.

Which is why the tulips I have now are in a very heavy vase indeed.